Tuesday, July 20, 2010


Last night, sleep did not come easy, so while i waited for it, i thought over the past one month and did an inventory of my thoughts and emotions...and the list below made the top three list of thoughts and feelings I'm not so proud of...

1. To the 7 wonderful women around me that are pregnant (2 sis, 1 sis-in-law, 4 friends) my thoughts were...please, don't load me with your stories of pee-ing, and back aches and barfing...if I ask, then i want to know, if i don't, i really don't wanna know

2. To my Dear Husband "D" my thoughts were, I'm on a major hormonal roller coaster so I really cant be nice all the time

3. To my friend going through a really tough time...get a grip girlfriend, life sucks sometimes so really, stop sulking and find the will to move on, I've got stuff to deal with too you know so quit your whining.

I could go on and try to explain these thoughts, but i wont, and finally as i drafted off to sleep, I smiled, cos i remembered that through the course of the day (yesterday)

1. I spoke wit all except 2 of the expectant mothers, and we shared stories and laughed real hard from our hearts

2. D hugged me real hard and whispered "You rock babe"

3. Spoke wit my friend and we thought up a game plan together, its working so far.

And for me....I'm just glad i didn't remain in that place....

PS: If you never have "un-charitabe" feelings towards others...pls kindly share your secret by comment or inbox....I really wanna know how ;), and if you're like me and u just wanna confess it...feel free to do same...I promise, i wont judge you :)


  1. Wheww! I feel much better now....I have similar thoughts from time to time and I thought that I was just being "mean"...if some ppl know how/what I think bout em sometimes, they wouldn't like me

    But hey I think it's normal, just as long as u turn them to positive things, etc

  2. Wish i cud say i've never been there but i can't honestly say so cos as 'nice' as people seem to think i am sometimes i deliberately:
    . let the phone go unanswered cos i cant stand hearing another story of how things went wrong
    . 'fall asleep' just before hubby steps into the room cos...
    . send my off to granny's cos i cant guarantee what i'd do the next time he goes "mommy this or that.."
    not cos i don't care for these people (heaven knows i do) but sometimes i need space to just be me, indulge in a lil pity party, sort out my own tumbling emotions and not be a super woman to all those who expect it of me. A friend's email signature reads something like this: 'courage doesn't always roar. sometimes its the small voice that at the end of the day that says - tomorrow I'd try again'
    So for those days i don't feel so nice i simply tell myself:
    "I'd try again tomorrow" - that's my style of courage

  3. @BB

    You're not alone o, I'm sure we're even more than we think we are...lol, it can be a tough call to always be on top of things, but at least we keep striving

    @ Anonymous

    Don't I just know what you mean..lol..I love your definition of courage, I think I'd borrow it (wink)

  4. I definitely have similar thoughts sometimes, especially when I think I'm going through worse things than someone is telling me about. But then again, I seem to always be reminded, like Esther, "what if I was placed in the kingdom for such a time as this?"

    I really like this post, lol :)

  5. Problem I have is that people tend to think it's unchristianly to have these thoughts but the truth is that they occur more often than not.

    I definitely my low moments when I'm mentally grouchy and wish people would leave me alone.

    Thankfully, it's never for long 'cos then I start feeling generous with people again. lol

    Thanks for sharing this. So nice to know that we all can relate.

  6. The graphic was hilarious though -- its all on my blog site?

    Uncharitable thoughts - a friend of mine called a few days ago and couldn't put her finger on what her problem was - in my head i was willing her to shut up already :( I gave the token listening ear though..

  7. I think this just makes us human. Sometimes I wish I could ignore so many emails asking me for one thing or the other but what can I do. If I close my fist, the blessings will stagnate and stop flowing. I am just a channel as I know.

  8. hmm honest brave post I must say...

    we all have our down moments but the key is not to dwell in them and am glad you are out of it now.

    take care girl :)

  9. *Hugs* for successfully coming out of it...

    Love the picture attached to this post. Yes you have sinned, lol but now forgiven.

  10. Good to know I'm not alone with the uncharitable thoughts. I used to feel it was severely disloyal to think them!

  11. I really really like the picture, very funny

    I have plenty of those thoughts o!
    I even read some people's thankful posts, and I 'm like, must you flaunt this or that?

    I've been avoiding visiting a friend cos I am just envious of all the joy and happiness around her, I keep willing she would just stop 'showing me'. Thank God for how he covers the thoughts that go through our minds else......

    Glad that you are out of that state.
    Really can relate with this post.
    I confess