Tuesday, June 16, 2009

The Gift called Marriage

Was going to add this to the last post but decided to separate them, i just love this part of TD Jakes, Woman thou art loosed

To the person you marry, you are saying,"when am old and when my time comes to leave this world, and the chilly wind of eternity blows away my birthdays, and my future stands cold and dark in the night, it's your face I want to kiss good-bye. It is your hand I want to squeeze as I slip from time into eternity. As the curtain closes on all I have attempted to do and be, I want to look into your eyes and see that I mattered. Not what I looked like. Not what I did or how much money I made. Not how talented I was. I want to look into the teary eyes of someone who loves me and see- I MATTERED!"

If you are looking for someone to be your everything, don't look around, look up! God is the only One who can be everything. By expecting perfection from the flesh, you ask more out of someone else than you are able to provide yourself. To be married is to have a partner- someone who can look up with you.

Like a suede jacket, the imperfection of your marriage adds to its uniqueness. It is mixing of good days, sad days, and all the challenges of life.

A truly good relationship is a spicy meal served on a shaky table, filled with dreams and pain and tender moments. Moments that, in those split second flashbacks, make you smile secret smiles in the middle of the day. Moments so strong they never die, yet so fragile they vanish like bubbles in a glass.

Cherish the moments...every one of them. Lift the glass and drink deeply of life. If you can look back and catch a few of those moments, or trace a smile back to a memory, you are blessed. You could have been anywhere doing anything, but instead the Maitre d' seated you at a table for two!

Woman thou art loosed
T.D. Jakes
Posted on 10:54 AM | Categories:


Sat 13th June

She woke up that morning to the sight of him getting ready to head out to church, he'd started the third phase of "membership classes" and had to be there before 7am, she lazily stretched as he kissed her good-bye, " drive safe ok" she says, as he walks out the door.

Left to her, she'd go straight back to sleep, but then, there's two weeks laundry to be done (thanks to the washman's leg being broken by his wife..lol), the toilets have to be scrubbed, the house cleaned, there's groceries to be bought, and lots of cooking to be done...phew, its one of those weekends.

So, she gets out of bed, puts on her superwoman cloak and sets out to work...

Skip forward, 11.30, the laundry is done, house is clean, toilets scrubbed, all that's left is groceries and cooking. The doorbell rings

"Hi hon" "how did it go, and how come your just gettin in, thought you guys were done by 9"

"yeah we were, but i was made the assistant president of the class so we had to stay back to sort out some things"

In her head she's thinking....Hmm, you work two services each sunday, go for two vigils every month, your unit serves at special church programmes,and now ur adding this responsibility again, mo' gbe, se pastor ni e abi kini? (I'm dead, are you a pastor or what), but she smiles and goes

" I do hope its not so time consuming, you know we're still working at spending more time together"

but what she really wants to say is

Nigga, what's ur problem, do you need an angel to come from heaven, hit you over the head with a stick and ask you to take it easy on the extra responsibilities ur picking up cos this home right here is like major important

He looks at her and he sure knows the wife he's married

"Baby, i know what you're thinking, but no, it wont affect our time, i've already told them i wont be around next week cos of our planned weekend trip, so i'm on top of this ok"....God sure saved his arse by putting those words in his mouth.

So she goes in to take a shower and as she walks out he holla's

"baby whats for breakfast"

"Did you get some bread on your way back so i could make some scrambled eggs with sausage to go with it"

"no i didnt, what else is at home"

"well, you could have scrambled eggs and sausages alone, with some baked beans"

"Shuoo, i resemble oyibo, baby, i'm hungry o, and you know that wont even..."

"Send Mohammed (the gateman) to buy bread then"

see me see wahala o, after doing your laundry and cleaning your house, you still dey ask me how we go take buy bread? if you like, no arrange that one yourself...mcheww

Monday 15th June

Skip ahead again Monday morning, she's on her way to work, she'd be stayin at her her sis' for the week and he's heading outta town as usual, so no one would be home.

"Baby, pls don't forget to drop of the stew and soup at Mama's place since its on ur way outta town and the power hasn't been steady all weekend, it'll break my heart after all the work i put in it to come back and find that its gone bad"

Skip ahead again 3hours later, he calls her

"Baby, i'm so sorry but i have to give out your stuff o, i cant stop over cos i'm running late and i need to sign some documents in Ib"

SAY WHAT!!!!!!
I slaved, sweated and worked real hard over that and see how this brutha is telling me glibly that he's about to give it out....to whom, for what!!! hmm, he just crossed a line there, he doesnt even appreciate the effort put into giving him good food ehn?

"No problem" she says, "do whatever you want to"

..in her mind she's thinking...but i promise you, i'd get back at you o, hmm, this one wont just go like that.

That night he calls

"Ololufemi, i've been calling since now, why didnt you pick my call, you still dey vex?"

"Me?...no o, i was taking a shower, how was your trip?"

"Exhausting, but really, hope your not still upset with me"

"At all, but i dont know how we'd do it for the next two weekends o, anyway, next weekend, we're travelling abi? so there's no need i guess its the upper weekend that'll be the problem"

"Problem how, what are you referring to?"

"I wont be cooking again o till first weekend in July, since its easy to give out my food like that, i guess it'll also be easy to do without it"

She can hear him calculating cos he's been looking forward to her special jollof rice and her special edikaikong (this yoruba man is so open to a variety of dishes) which she promised him over the weekend.

"Baby, i thought you said you were, not angry...ok, i promise, i'd go to the market for you, and i'm really sorry, its just the timing, i wanted........

Na him know, anyway, who am i kidding, my mama trained me well, so i know this is just me mouthing, come 27th, i'd be over that cooker, stirring and tasting, .....Phew.....HELP!!! I'M MARRIED....LOL

Anyway, it paid off, he's been calling and checking up more than usual....wink, although this post would spoil all that as soon as he reads it.

I know its a long post, but i needed to blog about something on a lighter note, did a post on my friend that i lost, but i felt it disrespected God so much, so deleted it and decided to post this instead.

Hope you guys have a great week, and thanks so much for the good wishes on the last post, really appreciate it and yes, i'd keep you all updated on the project.
Posted on 10:30 AM | Categories:

Thursday, June 4, 2009

Kindda random

I'm excited...Finally, i'm wrapping up on phase one of my project and it seems like its going to come out real good.

Working on a musical project with a friend, and we've been on it since like forever, we've gone back and forth, edited and right now, i'm liking what i hear. Its been a crazy one though, cash and time constraints, my friend loosing her mom....but God has seen us through and finally, we're almost there

I've been so grateful to God lately, cos amazingly, even in the midst of crap, He's really been like my own Superman.

"D" and i are like closer than we've ever been, even with the fact that we see only on weekends

We decided to do joint family devotions even while he away, via internet calls, and although we've not gotten the hang of it yet cos he's tired most evenings, the few times (ok one time to be precise...lol) we tried it, it was a wonderful experience

I've got a friend willing to help circulate our single track once its totally tidied up

This month started in an amazing way, we've got opportunities coming our way, we're like almost overwhelmed, it feels great.

Anyways, that aside, its amazing how our ageing parents turn a new leaf when the kids are all gone and its just the two of them left, my dad had us all laughing last week with his attempt at being romantic, sent an sms to my mom and it read

"My wife, this week i speak into your life God's blessings and His presence would surround you in everything you do, doesnt sound romantic yeah? but i tell you, its a major milestone for him o, a major one, infact, its his first sms to her since he got his phone and that several years ago...well, after 35years, i'd give him credit, cant blame him though, with the last of his 6 kids leaving home in a few months, i guess he's finally realised that she's all he's got left.

Finally, i cant wait for "D" to be around more often, like this week, i feel so on fire but i have to wait till the weekend to douse that fire, told him yesterday, and he's trying to come home a bit early this week, today to be precise, i hope it works out well, hmmm, how do married couples living in different continents survive, i really give em kudos.

I've been extremely tired all week, i hope i rest it off this weekend, you all have a great weeeked ahead and congrats to the new father in blogville, Afronuts ,Timi, is just adorable and to all you may kids. Happy Birthday in advance